Baby can I hold you?

Today is going down in the record books.

Today my breath was taken away.

Today I got to watch a life come into this world.

Today I got to watch that life take her first breaths in this world.

Today I got to witness one of the many miracles of the human body.

Today I got to give that little miracle her very first bath.

Today I got to see to joy in her parents eyes as they held her for the first time.

Today my mind is so overcome with the emotions of joy, awe and happiness;

I am literally speechless.

Today is a day I will never forget.

a radio with the speakers blown...

Okay, so I'm going to take a little break from all the nursing stuff to talk about some music. Now, anyone that knows me knows that music is a big part of my life. I study with music, I get ready with music playing- let's just say I'm listening to music pretty much all the time. Some of my best memories are from various concerts, and I definitely wouldn't have made it this far into school if it weren't for my study mixes.

I went to The Hood Internet concert this past Friday (hence the picture), and it pretty much made my week. I get the same kind of feeling from live music that I do from working out, it just makes me giddy and genuinely happy. In my mind there is no better way to de-stress from school than to plug in my iPod and blast my favorite songs.

So I just thought I would enlighten y'all to some of my favorite music right now, specifically some of my favorite duets, just because! (and maybe to expand you're music interests).

So first off is actually a local band right out of Omaha, The Good Life. The song is called Inmates, and I really like the sound of these two together and the simplicity of the song.

Second comes Yankee Bayonet by The Decemberists.

And of course I need to mention some Brad Paisley and Alison Krauss in Wiskey Lullaby. By far this is one of my favorites of all time, hands down.

Paperweight by Joshua Radin and Schuyler Fisk is one that I just recently discovered, but it's been on repeat on my iPod since I downloaded it.

And just because I am obessesed with Heidi Klum I have to add this one where she duets with her husband, Seal. It's called Wedding Day, and it's actually not that bad!

Then of course there is one of my favorite bands, Snow Patrol teaming up with Martha Wainwright in Set Fire to the Third Bar.

I love me some Imogean Heap, and Blue October, so Congratulations off of Blue October's Foiled CD makes the list. Such a heartbreaking song.

Lastly, comes Where the Stars Go Blue by Bethany Joy Lenz and Tyler Hilton. Now, I know Tim McGraw also sang this song, but I believe that these two do a much better job than Tim did by himself.

So sit back, and enjoy the music.

five days and counting

I've come to the conclusion that time does exactly the opposite of what you want it to. When you want the time to go fast it seems to drag on second by second, and vise versa. Last semester seemed like it dragged on forever when all I wanted was Christmas break, but yet now time seems to be flying by. Today was the first day of March, spring break starts on Friday, I finish my 2nd clinical this week--where is the time going? I am really enjoying this semester, I don't want it to be halfway over.

I do want this latest rotation to be over though. I tried to go into this rotation with an open mind, because you can never love something if you don't give it the chance, but let me tell you I got my answer in the first few minutes of the first day. Adult Medical/Surgical, which is pre-op/post-op patients, is just not my thing. Most of the patients are 65+, and not in to good of health. It seems to remind me a lot of long term care last semester, but not quite so intense. I just don't seem to be enjoying the older adult population quite as much as the younger population. Things just seem to smell worse, look worse and are just so much more depressing. Whenever I get to do nursing I always enjoy it, but this rotation I'm not really having any fun.

So needless to say, one thing I am ready to be over is this rotation. Also, I am very ready for spring break. I'm ready to be back in Texas again and to see sunshine every day.

But as always, it's not gonna come easy. I have a midterm tomorrow, two more days of clinical and a John Mayer concert to go to before I can officially call it spring break and be back on Texas soil! Five more days is all I have to keep telling myself....

and i had the best day...

I seem to have hit the traditional winter slump. I am so over winter, over the cold, over being in Omaha, but most of all over this snow and cloudy days. I want sunshine, clear skies, green grass and most importantly temperature over 32 degrees. But this was probably the best week of my semester so far- if for no other reason than the fact that I got to observe a surgery!

Now, I've been waiting to see a surgery pretty much since I walked in the doors of my first class freshman year. (That might be a little bit of an exaggeration) But really, I have been impatiently waiting to see a surgery for what feels like an eternity! And let me tell you, I was completely blown away. I had the chance to observe a complete abdominal hysterectomy, meaning that it wasn't done by scope, there was an actual abdominal incision.

And wow, that's really all I have to say about the whole experience. I've never really wanted to be a doctor, it's never really appealed to me, but this experience has the power to make me reconsider. I'm pretty sure I've ruled out becoming a scrub nurse/circulating nurse because they don't really do much, the surgeons are the ones that get to all the cool stuff. The surgeons get to deal with all the blood and guts, they get to cut people open then stitch them right back up. SO COOL. I can't even begin to describe the awe that I felt as I was standing there watching this surgery occur, I wish I could have paused the surgery and just stood there for a little bit longer.

Granted, this wasn't open heart surgery, but nevertheless it was still amazing. Just the simple fact to me that one day someone decided it would be a good idea to cut a patient open to try and cure their disease amazes me- who would think of something like that? But I guess that's the whole thing with medicine, it's all so amazing that 100 years ago half the stuff we do now wasn't even invented yet.

I mean wow, that just make you take a step back and think about things a little bit.

no habla espanol

Yet again, I seem to have come to another realization through my clinical experiences.

Right now, I just finished my second week in my pediatric rotation (which I LOVE) but last week was a little difficult for me. What made it difficult was fact that I couldn’t really communicate with both my patient, and her parents. Now, my patient was only an infant, so I didn’t come into this week expecting to hold a full conversation with her, however with her parents it was a different story. Her parent’s primary language was Spanish, which I have encountered before, but not quite to this extent. What I am used to is someone of Hispanic descent who primarily speaks Spanish, but who also understands English. This wasn't the case with my parents though. I felt like these parents didn’t really understand a word I was saying, which made me feel powerless.

I was able to do my job- I was able to assess my patient every 4 hours and correctly administer all her medications to her, but I felt like something was missing. In pediatrics communication with the parents is vital, and I really wasn't able to do that. An interpreter was called for when the physicians came to the room, so I was able to ask questions then, but the interpreter only came once a day for the two days I was there. So all the other dozen times I walked into my patient's room I was flying blind, thinking the whole time that I really should learn Spanish.

So there I was, someone who was supposed to be the advocate between the parents and the doctor, and I didn't even know what my parents were saying, or what their questions or concerns about there daughter were.

I suddenly had flashbacks to high school, where my counselor would try and stress to me how important taking a second language would be later in my life, which was a message that never seemed to get through to me. All I kept on thinking was that I should have taken that advice more seriously, because a second language is a skill that will only help you in positive ways. I know this week I really could have used even some basic Spanish like “I’m going to examine your daughter now” or “I’m here to give your daughter her medication.” Instead, I had to speak in a language that they didn't really understand, and just hope that they somewhat understand what I needed to do.

So I guess you could say now that I had my eyes opened. Now I have a desire to learn Spanish (and take it seriously) because when I decided to become a nurse I didn't decided to only be a nurse to certain people, I want to help everyone. If that means I have to do a little bit of extra schooling, then so be it, because if it's going to make me a really good nurse, then it's worth it in the end.

life, fall fast now.

Wow- I can't believe it's already FEBRUARY! (where did January go?) Oh wait- that's right I worked my little butt off all through January and now I'm feeling the repercussions. Luckily for me, February is just a little bit calmer than the month before it. I guess the new year really did start off with a bang!

Just to put it all in perspective let me tell you a little story about just how tired I was last weekend, after my first week of clinical- which should first be prefaced by my telling you that I'm not one who takes naps, at all. Okay, so last Friday I got home from clinical by 3:00ish, hurried up and finished all my paperwork so I could take a nap before going out to dinner. Let's just say that dinner never happened- because when I laid down for my nap at 3:30, I didn't really take into account just how tired I was, instead I realized it when I woke up at 10:45PM!!! Yeah, major fail. So me, being the smart person that I am, decided that after sleeping 6 hours I would eat a little dinner and go right back to sleep- and not wake up until 7:00 Saturday morning! Needless to say, I was just a little tired. I mean, it's not like I was missing out on any stellar Friday night plans, but still-for me to sleep through pretty much an entire afternoon is kind of a big deal.

Yeah, so I'm kind of glad January is over. I've already taken: 7 Quizzes, 3 tests and completed one week of clinical (geez)! And I Kappa had Recruitment the first week we got back, so that was another whirlwind! It seems that I've finally found my groove though, I seem to have finally settled into my schedule. February- I'm looking forward to you and all your calmness. Only 2 tests, and clinical- it'll practically seem like summer compared to the rate I've been going. Now only if the weather would warm up a little I would be golden! Instead, it decided to snow again, and just make me lose all hope for spring any time soon. Oh well, you win some, you lose some!

Don't forget to remember me..

It's the last day of 2009 (at least it was when I started this), which means many things are coming to a close. It's the end of the holiday season, the end of the decade, (almost) the end of winter break. But it's also the beginning of many new things, the new year always seems like the time that people make new plans, turning over new leaves. Many people see new year's eve as a time to start making new memories, new plans, to become that person they didn't become in 2009.

With the new year, the stress is put on new. New memories, new friends, new workout, new study habits, new resolutions, new, new, new... Now I'm all for making new year's resolutions, I've even made them every new year. Naturally, they never last longer than a few weeks, then I'm back to my old habits that I was trying to change.

This year, however I have a different kind of new year resolution, which I realized about a month ago. When I was in my Clinical Integration rotation we were at an assisted living facility, which also had a memory support unit (among other things) where I spent most of my time. The memory support unit consisted of older adults who had symptoms of dementia (or memory loss) and early signs of Alzheimer's. There were about 25 adults living in this unit, and no two had the same amount of memory loss. Now, I think I said that this rotation was all about communication, so I literally just found someone who wanted to talk and had a conversation with them. These conversations ranged anywhere from 20 minutes to 2 hours. As expected I spent over half the conversation answering the exact same question over and over again, but it was a conversations nevertheless. And was in these repetitive conversations that I realized perhaps my most important lesson of the semester, which I'm not even sure if I can place it into words. I'll try my best though...

Talking to these amazing people, I realized that perhaps one of the worst things that could ever happen to a person is to loose your memory. In my mind, life pretty much boils down to making memories- so what happens when no longer remember them? What happens when you slowly forget your life? So my new year's resolution this year is to REMEMBER. And to do everything I can for myself so that down the line I will still remember. If that means taking more pictures, becoming healthier, or even starting a journal- I'm down. I want to square myself away now so that when times come where I might not remember everything, I have something to look back on that will remind me, and bring back those memories and those emotions- if even for a short while. I want to do as much as I can now, so that when I can't anymore I won't look back and wish that I had been more involved, or had been better friend, or even had more fun. But another part of this is living a healthy lifestyle, because in my mind being healthy now means that I'll be healthier later on in life, which makes a world of difference in the older adult's world (as I'm learning now).

I want to remember, and not just the big things that happen, I want to remember all the little things to because as the saying goes:

"it's all the little things that make a world of difference."